Crossroads of a Decision

So Mike tells me, it's an easy decision... and I wish I could look at things as simply as he does. But I don't. For me, making a decision means that I have to analyze and over analyze and ponder every possible outcome. I have to consider priorities and how those priorities play into the decision. It's like a wrestling match...I have to wrestle thru a decision...fight, struggle...really, it's quite mentally exhausting. In big decisions, I have to ask myself questions like, 'when I get to the end of my life...do I think I'll be pleased with this decision, or have regrets?'. I ponder things like, 'God, is this a decision that is right for me/for my family?' Why do I ask these questions? I don't know...but that's how my brain is wired! Whether I want it to or not, my brain just goes there when I'm facing a big decision. So here I stand, once again, at the crossroads of a decision... and feeling quite exhausted with the process. Sigh.

My Amazing Husband

Everyday Mike gives me at least a dozen reasons or more to appreciate him! It's hard for me to put into words all the ways I appreciate him, but today, I just wanted to pause and share a few of the projects he's done around our home the past year and half. He never has a pre-made kit, he just figures it out in his head and makes it. I am so proud of him and his ability to make stuff like this and so appreciative of his willingness to try these many projects I come up with! Let's see, next project? Build some benches with all the bricks that we have laying around!

Most recent project: Coat Rack in Laundry Room (Winter 10)

Hard to get a good picture of this, but he built playhouse and swingset for girls (Spring 09)

Fireplace he designed and put in our basement (Fall 09)

Bench he built in our kitchen (Summer 08)

The Power of Words

So in the silence of my home this morning I am touched by the words of stranger. I received a card from her today. Her name is Bridgette and I've never met her. But two months ago I sent her a card. You see 3 years ago her son was murdered. And she is grieving still. A part of her grieves every anniversary of her son's death.

Last Fall, through a national organization called Parents of Murdered Children, I began writing 'anniversary' letters to strangers, hoping and praying that that my words would let them know they are not alone. Their loved ones are not forgotten. Their grief is real. There is something so very powerful in words. And as much as I love technology, there is something very powerful about a handwritten note. So every month I write to 25 strangers and whisper a prayer that the God of this universe may touch them in the very depth of their soul and bring them to the next place of healing on this journey. Bridgette wrote "Thank you so much for your tender words and kind thoughts, during this time. I thought this month would be so hard to deal with, but through the prayers of people and God's wonderful mercy I made it through!"

I am thankful that we are not alone in this world, we have each other, and we have a God who is as near as our whispers. And we have words to help us express it all.

Sweet Reality

So last night as I am going to bed, I say to Mike "Sweet Dreams" and he says, "Why do I need sweet dreams when I have a sweet reality?" I've thought about that all day. That's kinda the season of life we are in. We've been thru hard times and we aren't naive enough to think that hard times won't come again, but for this moment in our life...it truly does feel like this sweet reality. Perhaps that's why I want to capture into words so much of our days. I want this sweet reality to live on forever. I don't want to forget the details. I'm also aware of how quickly these years with our girls are flying by! So here are the details of our Easter day:

So Easter morning begins before 6am...Sarah is wide awake with a huge smile and ready for Easter! By 6:20, her sister is also awake, so they crawl into our bed, full of excitement. Morgan says, "I like finding the chocolate eggs.: I reply,"oh really, what eggs? Better go see if there are any this year!". We lay in bed just listening to them search. Then the crying starts...you're finding too many, it's not fair...oh my, now I know why my mom had one of us find the eggs in the basement and the other found them upstairs. Note to self: Next year's egg hunt will be on both levels of the house. :) So finally after a little while, they inquire as to their baskets. After getting the first clue they are off on a treasure hunt for their baskets. They are so full of excitement and so giddy over every little thing in their baskets. They loved the nail clippers (when I got them, Mike said, "oh, that's just what I'd want for Easter!" I knew they would love them and they did.) They also really liked the aqua sand and spent a lot of time playing with it today. Yes, it made a mess everywhere, but messes clean up.

We then had our cinnamon rolls for breakfast and got ready for church. I took the time to put curls in the the girls' hair, something they just love! Morgan tried to curl her own hair and got a little burnt. :( They were also very excited that they got to wear dangly earrings today. I also got to wear a new outfit that I got shopping with my mom when she was here, so that was fun. We then paused to capture a few pictures.


We had a fun church service and enjoyed celebrating with others the Risen Christ! After church, we got ready for our picnic and went and had our Easter picnic by the creek. It was a perfect spring day...77, breezy, everything is flowering (forsythias bright yellow, brilliant white pears, beautiful pink tulip trees). We also went for a short walk. And on our walk, and throughout the day, I keep hearing Morgan sing my favorite Easter Song "Was it a Morning Like This?" by Sandi Patti. It was perfect.

We came home and tried to fly a kite, as really it wasn't just breezy, but quite windy. We were mildly successful. The girls just played awhile after that. I got a chance to talk with my mom and got tears in my eyes that we couldn't be there for Easter dinner. My sister also called and left a message, which was nice. We then made up some deviled eggs and had those for dinner, along with milkshakes. Then we decided to end the day geocaching. We found all 3 of the caches we went searching for! At bedtime, we completed the last 'egg'...we have Resurrection Eggs that tell the Easter story. In the past, I've just told them the story, this year, we actually took time and read all the scriptures that went with the eggs and had a deeper discussion. So at bed, I asked the girls their 2 favorite things about today and here is what they said:

Morgan's favorite 2 things today...going on a picnic and Jesus rising from the dead. And Finding chocolate Easter eggs first thing this morning. And wearing dangly earrings. (Think that's 4...but sometimes it's just so hard to choose!)

Sarah's favorite 2 things today...finding her Easter basket and going geocaching just before bed.

Staycation

We had lots of fun on our staycation spring break, especially sharing it with my mom and dad! We packed in a lot of fun too!! We rode the high wire bike at the Discovery Center, painted pottery, played cards and dominoes, rode our bikes to Sonic to get 1/2 price drinks, the girls played webkinz with my mom lots! Mike & I went out to dinner and a movie (for only $7.50!), had a gift card for Red Robin and went to the cheap theatre to see The Blind Side, while my parents took the girls to Incredible Pizza...fun! My mom & I went out to lunch at a Tea Room and then we went shopping. Mike & my dad went out to lunch for BBQ. We saw Alvin & the chipmunks: The Squeakel...I enjoyed watching the girl's reactions to the movie, as much as the movie itself. We all went and volunteered at Convoy of Hope, we packaged food into coolers that were shipping out to Haiti the next day. We enjoyed dinner at Andys (yes, we had frozen custard for dinner one night!) and McCallisters. We also enjoyed sitting down at the table for some healthy, home cooked meals. We ended the week with a trip to Silver Dollar City. They have a new 'thing' there where kids can 'pan' for real gems...the girls loved that! It was just lots of fun 'playing' together and enjoying life together. Yes, this week was about fun and togetherness.

St. Patrick's Day Update

Ok the girls were hilarious this morning. Neither one wanted to stick their hand in the trap 'cuz they were afraid the leprechaun was hiding in the box. They were excited about m&m's and glitter and green milk and yes, even that the leprechaun used our toliet when it stopped by. They were disappointed that their double trap did NOT catch a leprechaun. We figured the leprechaun must have been smart and took the ladder in with him, so he coud climb back out. And then he must have used the m&m's he left to keep the trap 'heavy' so that it would not fall on him as he took out the gold. Those leprechauns are tricky! Just ask Mike, they even turned the milk he took to work green. It appears we'll have to get smarter for next year if we're going to catch ourself a leprechaun! We also enjoyed our green dinner tonight!

St. Patrick's Day

So I've discovered that St. Patrick's Day is a small little holiday in which I can break up the routine of life and have a little fun. I've always made a green dinner for the girls. And last year we started making leprechaun traps to catch us a leprechaun. So this year the girls informed me that they know leprechauns aren't real...they are just folklore...and yet, they still want to make a trap. They are at that age where their brain tells them leprechauns aren't real, but their imaginations and their hearts secretly hope they really are.

So last night they built this elaborate trap with Mike. They had different ideas for a trap, so it became quite elaborate as they figured out how to combine ideas into 1 trap. On the outside of the box is a ladder with a door and a note that says "pot of gold inside". If the leprechaun climbs up and jumps in the box to get the gold, then there is no way for him to climb back out. Then inside the box is a pot of gold that is on top of a 'trap'. The trap is connected to a pulley system, so when he takes out the gold, it becomes lighter which moves the container which is connected to a bowl above it, that will fall down and trap the leprechaun. I'm probably not explaining this the best...but it's cool!

On the menu today?
Breakfast - Lucky Charms with (hopefully) milk the leprechauns turned green last night.
Lunch - Green yogurt, green apples w/peanut butter, green juice, green cookie
Dinner - green beans, green mashed potatoes, chicken (definitely NOT green), green milk and mint chocolate chip ice cream sandwiches.

I will try and post pictures later today. Right now I need to go wake up 2 girls to see if they caught a leprechaun last night!

Sarah

Sarah's 1st Grade (Patriotic) Music Program was tonight. They sang this song, "You are our Heroes" and I cried. I always cry at their school programs. This is just a sweet season of life we are in.

I couldn't help but think, as I listened to the song, that in my ways Sarah is my hero. There are so many qualities that she possesses that I wish I had more of in my life. The ability to live care-free, to not worry about tomorrow, what others think or even what the next minute will be... she has the ability to live in the moment. She's bright and works hard in school. She reminds me of the obvious (like I really shouldn't be surprised it is raining all week in March because after all, it is Spring!) She gives hugs and smiles easily. We nicked named her sweetheart when she was a baby... and it is the perfect name for her. She is always kind to others. She is just a sweet, sweet child. Her love and sweetness just pours out thru her smile.

Is she perfect? no. Does she have things she needs to work on (like listening and taking care of her things and not being lazy and letting others do everything for her?) yes. But that's what makes her human. I am so thankful for the gift of sharing life with her!

Can I also say that I loved an excuse to put curls in her hair and let her wear my dangly earrings! Sarah, you are so beautiful!

What Matters Most

Several years ago, when I attended a Hearts At Home conference, I heard Mary Byers speak. I've been on her mailing list ever since. Sometimes I read her emails, sometimes I don't, depending on how busy I am when they arrive. Today I paused to read her words and they spoke to me. I wanted to blog about them, so I can reflect again on them later. She wrote:

That's my message to you this month: as your children change, you need to change, too. Partly to be what they need as they grow, but also to be the woman God created you to be. It doesn't serve our children well if we hold ourselves back.

Spring is a time of renewal and new growth. As we enter this season, I encourage you to pause, close your eyes, and ask, "What matters most?" Not just for your children, but for you as well.

I think I need to spend some quiet time reflecting on these thoughts.

Morgan

Morgan and I hung out tonight. We had the best dinner of ever (her words)...tacos and cheesy fiesta potatoes from Taco Bell. We decided to call it our 'Convoy dinner' and eat it every time we volunteered at Convoy of Hope.

Tonight we went and packaged beans at Convoy of Hope. The beans are being sent to both Haiti and Chile to help earthquake victims. As we were leaving she said "That was a lot of fun." Yes, my daughter, it was a lot of fun hanging out with you and helping others!

I also just had to say that Morgan wrote a note on a napkin and hid it in my lunchbox today. It said, "Mom I love you. I hope you are having a fun day today. Love, Morgan" Oh, sweetie, you are so thoughtful!

Thursday I'm going to be the mystery reader in her class and I'm looking forward to surprising her! I love sharing life with her. Morgan, my life is fuller because you are a part of it!