Even as I sit down now to write this, I'm not really sure what I'm going to say. I've been contemplating this all week long and nothing in particular has jumped out at me! Hmmm.
The thing I've been focusing on this month is becoming healthier - physically, emotionally, relationally I think if I can stop delaying my 'health', then I will be in a better place to pursue my dreams and be ready for what is ahead.
Physically, I've been trying to add some exercise back into my life. In particular, some extra stretches for my arms and shoulders which have been causing me quite a bit of pain from stress and tension. Being at the computer adds to the tension. The tension leads to quite a bit of headaches. I'm noticing improvement with daily stretching and exercising, so I'm trying to be faithful in this area.
Emotionally, I struggle with depression. I hate this. I look at my life and think, "there is nothing that should depress me." seriously. And yet, I've struggled off and on with it for years. So I finally broke down (okay, literally crying in the doctors office! geez.) and talked with the doctor about it. We are exploring options. I know my depressive state often keeps me from having the motivation to pursue my dreams. So I'm being brave and doing my best to figure out a way to 'deal with' and 'heal' from whatever is causing this.
Relationally, I don't want to pursue these dreams in isolation. I've discussed it before in depth on my blog, but deep, in real life, friendship have been hard to develop since our move 4.5 years ago. But I've decided I'm not giving up. I'm actually joining a bible study this week with some other amazing gals. I've never met them, but I'm hopeful that we will connect 'deeply' and develop some life-giving, life-sustaining friendships. Several of my closest friends today are gals I met in similar settings. (just wish they didn't live hours away!)
Well after just helping my daughter for the past 3 hours finish up her timeline project on China's Dynasties, my brain is mush. (And what began with her throwing her pencil across the room, ended with a hug and apology - so perhaps I did something right tonight.) I'm not even sure all this makes sense, but I'm calling it a wrap!
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1 comment:
Hi, friend. :) This is a great post...I think you are wise to take a step back and look at the different ways you can work on you. (Does that make sense? I mean it in a positive way, I promise!) I'm continuing to pray for you...especially that God will bring some amazing women and friends into your real-life through this Bible study.
Have a great week...and woohoo! for that finished project! (Is she in 5th grade by any chance? I taught a unit on China when I was a 5th grade teacher.) :) Blessings!
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