Halloween

Here are a few pictures that caputre our day today. We spent the afternoon raking leaves and jumping in them. We laughed a lot at the dog's first chance to play in the leaves. Then we had Spaghetti and eyeballs for dinner. And then our neighbors invited us to go trick or treating with them around the block and then had us over for a campfire and smores. It was a fun halloween day!

Profound and Beautiful

This morning our pastor prayed these words, "Lord, help us to rest in you who are both profound and beautiful." I have been reflecting on those words ever since he spoke them.

Here are some definitions:

• Rest: (a) Peace, ease, or refreshment resulting from sleep or the cessation of an activity (like worry). (b) Relief or freedom from disquiet or disturbance. (c) Mental or emotional tranquillity.
• Profound: (a) having intellectual depth and insight (b) difficult to fathom (c) characterized by intensity of feeling or quality (d) all encompassing, complete
• Beautiful: the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit:loveliness

So how would my day, the stress in my day, the worries that weigh me down look different if I truly rested in Him who was profound and beautiful? Why do I let worries and stress steal that sweet place of rest in Him who is both profound and beautiful and who calls me His child? I'm thankful he doesn't require perfection...He just asks for us to accept grace and to take a journey towards His heart to discover a sweet place of rest.

Ties That Bind Us

I like this quote I read on facebook. I know this is true in my life.

The ties that bind us are sometimes impossible to explain. They connect us even after it seems like the ties should be broken. Some bonds defy distance and time and logic; because some ties are simply...meant to be.

Long Day, but Perfect Evening

Today was a long day. Really long. Today, my parents should have been arriving, but due to Influenza A (also known as Swine Flu) that has hit our family, they have postponed their trip (can't blame them, it's still disappointing!). Morgan went back to school today, Sarah is still down with a fever. I had to go back to work today and Mike got to stay home with her...I wish I was the one with all the sick leave (not him!) because I want to be home with my kids when they are sick. And yet I know Sarah enjoyed her day spent with her daddy. And I am glad he is so willing to be home with them, it is a blessing that he does have the time and he is willing to take it! It has not stopped raining all day...the kind of rain you can hear on the roof top kinda rain. That meant indoor recess at school. Several kids went home with fever at school today. I easily could have come home from school depressed and yet I decided to put on my pjs, turn on the fireplace (Ok, gas fireplaces are growing on me...although I still miss the smell of real fire!), bake some chocolate chip cookies, make some chicken noodle soup, and cuddle up on the sofa and listen to the rain fall and fall and fall...and I guess 6 more inches are still coming our way...

Dancing in the Rain

"Life's not about waiting for the storms to pass, but it's about learning to dance in the rain." I first heard this quote a little over a year ago and I love it. It's the kind of 'life perspective' that I want to have in life. It's the attitude I want to permeate from my core. It's about living in the moment 'and making it so beautiful it's worth remembering' despite the circumstances around me. And as much as I love it, it's not always easy to do. But yesterday I celebrated as I chose this attitude.

Our friends came to stay the weekend with us and go to Silver Dollar City (SDC) with us. We've been anticipating this for awhile. So Saturday arrives and just as we go to leave for SDC it starts raining. And it never stopped. Despite the weather forecast of 30% scattered rain, we spent the entire day at Silver Dollar City in the rain, sometimes misty sprinkles other times torrential downpour. And yet we laughed, we joked, we played in the rain! And what fun the water rides were! On top of that Sarah got sick yesterday...vomited in the car on the way there and the way back. She spent most of the day at SDC enjoying herself, but around 3pm her little tummy began to ache again. So while the others went and rode rides, I sat on the bench with her, held her, sang to her and she fell asleep in my arms. Oh what a precious few moments those were. She's starting to get so big and to have her fall asleep in my arms and give me a moment to just be thankful for her and to smell her hair and kiss her forehead, and thank God for the blessing she is in my life, well it was priceless!

And today, because she's still not feeling well, we didn't go to church. I miss the Sundays we don't go and yet I have been enjoying some time reading my bible, praying, listening to some online sermons from our old church. I've been appreciating this unexpected morning. Sometimes the best plans and routines are interrupted with stroms. So I might not always remember to dance in the rain...but this weekend I did...and it's been wonderful!

Grief

Tonight I'm thankful for Grief. It's not that I enjoy grief, and yet there is something healing when you pause to grieve. Today I'm grieving the tragedy of 9/11 once again. It still moves me to tears and I still ache for those who lost so many loved ones that day. I still can't even comprehend such evil acts and I still feel proud for such bravery we saw that day as the news unfolded. What deep tragedy. It still brings tears to my eyes. This year I attempted to explain this tragedy to the girls.

I'm also grieving 'cuz it's grandparents day at school. First, I miss living close to my parents, I miss my kids being able to celebrate fun days like this at school with them. It also makes me miss Mike's parents and I still wish they were here to share life with.

Lastly, this week, I was reminded that I once again need to grieve some disappointments from the past few years. Those disappointments are preventing me from moving forward in some areas of life. I'm hoping that in pausing to grieve, I will be able to step forward again.

I'm glad God gave us emotions, 'cuz I couldn't imagine living life without them.

End of Summer

Even though we've been in school a few weeks, Labor Day really feels like the end of summer. Our 'Fall' is filled with routine and work and commitments. But what things about this last summer did I love? I loved waking up slowly in the mornings, laying in bed with our new laptop. I loved having time to write the draft of my memoir. I loved the week the girls spent the mornings at horse camp and I had some time to myself. I loved that our trips to WI, MA and MI allowed the girls to play with all their cousins this summer. I loved celebrating our 15th anniversary. I loved watching the girls fly across the lake on the tube! I loved the cooler summer that reminded me more of a 'Michigan Summer'. I loved visiting Silver Dollar City all summer long with family and friends. I loved reading more books than I could count. I loved 1/2 price drinks at Sonic. I loved the sunshine.

And here comes Autumn...cooler temps, chili suppers, picking up walnuts, Sunday drives to see the world be painted beautiful, sweatshirts, football, bike rides, long walks. Ahhh, each season has reasons to celebrate!

One Year Later

So one year ago, I attended the general PTO meeting, didn't know a soul, was overwhelmed about being in a new place and I remember sobbing on my way home. I wrote about it my blog. So tonight on my way there I was thinking about how a year later I would probably know people there...and I did. It was so nice to feel 'connection'! And as I left, I was reflecting on how a year ago the God of the universe amazed and moved me thru and song. Tonight, another song came on the radio and it spoke to me...a lot of it reflects some of my current struggles. And once again I feel loved by the God of the universe! Some things have changed this past year and others have remained the same! Here are a few of the lyrics (it's by Michael W. Smith).

The wind is moving, But I am standing still
A life of pages Waiting to be filled
A heart that's hopeful, A head that's full of dreams
But this becoming Is harder than it seems

Hear me asking Where do I belong?
Is there a vision That I can call my own?
Show me, I'm Looking for a reason

I need your light to help me find My place in this world,
My place in this world

When I was younger I thought it would be easy to find my place in this world - but then life has its twists and turns and here I am... still wondering... thankful for this life that is mine... doing my best to bloom where I am right now... and yet wondering what is next for me....

Happy Medium

So I'm trying to find that happy medium between being busy and not being too busy where I can't enjoy life. I'm adding a lot to my calendar this Fall, but I'm looking forward to it. Getting involved in church again (excited about a new small group), volunteering with a couple of new organizations, being a girl scout leader, and working full time. It should keep me plenty busy...I just hope not too busy. My commitments are only twice a month each, so I don't think it will be too bad. I've enjoyed this past year of replenishing and not being so involved, but I'm also looking forward to this new season of busy. It won't last forever. I'm still hoping my weekends involve a lot of 'down' time enjoying Mike and the girls and being together as family...of treasuring what's most important to me. And even though I've been busy lately, I've noticed a lot of laughter in my days, and that feels good. I've also been singing this song this past week..."Life's a dance, you learn as you go, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow..." I'm definitely entering a season of leading and it feels right and good.

Sleepy ramblings

I should so be sleeping right now...but I just can't. Lots on my mind. School back in session. Trying to figure out where all I should invest my time...besides working, being a wife and a mom...girl scouts? church? other causes I'm passionate about? how much time should I devote to these things? And my body is so sore...skiing and tubing were a blast yesterday...and today, well today, I'm just sore. Wish I could find time to get back to the gym. Perhaps life will settle back into a routine in a couple of weeks...right now it just feels chaotic. This week alone we have parent meetings at school, meeting with surveyor and also with builder (about deck), dog getting spade, following up on volunteer opportunity, meeting with guy from church about volunteering, gymnastics, need to meet up with photographer to finalize our order for family pictures, connect me event at church, and Mike wants to go camping this weekend...which sounds great, just no idea when I'm going to be able to get ready. And I'm not really complaining... this life I get to live is wonderful... it's just that sometimes when I'm in the midst of it, I just wish I could hit the pause button! :)

And why did Morgan have to ask me today on the way to school... "Mom, if you could be doing any job, what would you do?" That's just made me think way too much! :) So I asked them what job they think I would be good at. And Sarah (my daughter who is always thinking outside of the box! - seriously, her answers ALWAYS surprise me!) answers, "I think you'd be a great stuffed animal maker!" It's made me laugh all day. So I'm thankful for both my girls... one who makes me pause and think about deeper issues and the other who makes me laugh!